Memoir of a blessing disguised as a tragedy. More than two million Americans have bipolar disorder. In her memoir, Michelle Holtby tells how the illness ruined-and saved-her life. In May 2001, at age 27, a brain disorder overwhelms her. Soon she slips into an alternate reality and believes she's God. Hospitalization and a diagnosis of bipolar disorder bring stability. But what about recovering? How does she learn to live with her mental illness? And above all, she wants to know why God wrecked her life-causing her to loose her career, friends, and home. Over the next 7 years Michelle peers into the cracks of her soul to confront her anguish, anger, and self-loathing. Finding new meaning for her life powerfully aids her recovery. By extracting healing insights from her wrenching loss, she moves forward to wellness. But each day she must actively choose to remain in balance. It's a constant challenge to push aside the negative voices in her head. Every day she consciously embraces hope to ensure continued recovery. To help others on their journey to wellness, she shares many of her practical self-care techniques. This memoir is for anyone whose life has been touched by mental illness. With candor and bravery, Michelle Holtby gives a taut and compelling eyewitness account of living with bipolar disorder. Her memoir confronts stigma and replaces it with understanding. In overcoming despair, she shows how hope and faith endure and guide her recovery.